Sponsored
Magnet Cologne
Guaranteed to attract singles, pigeons, and one confused cyclist named Johan. Range: 500 meters.
Field test results
Singles attracted
7.2 per hour
Pigeons attracted
WAY TOO MANY
Mystery aura intensity
MAX
Smell notes
- Top: neon citrus and confidence
- Middle: mystery and dramatic eye contact
- Base: sandalwood and questionable decisions
No actual cologne is for sale here. Joke site.